Yakuza 0 (WoolieVersus)

WoolieVs Yakuza 0
Watch this Let's Play on YouTube
Game	Yakuza 0
Original Run	Dec 14, 2020 -
Controller	Woolie

“Woolie, it's the fuckin' 80's. Spend that fuckin' money, let's go!” — Little V

WoolieVS Yakuza 0 is a full Let's Play in which Woolie and Little V Mills take another trip to Japan, this time straight to the 80's, when exchanging CP was acceptable and fisting artists were a lucrative profession, and proceed to never kill anyone, study the bat, destroy Japan's economy

About

“New Woolie VS shirts! https://store.roosterteeth.com/products/woolie-vs-logo-t-shirt
Woolie VS Tip Jar: https://streamlabs.com/woolieversus/tip

Featuring:
Woolie https://twitter.com/WoolieWoolz
Little V https://www.youtube.com/user/LittleVMills

Edited by Minh https://twitch.tv/SoushinSen
Intro by Minh and Little V”

— Video description

Quotes

“You come at the king, you best come correct!”

— Woolie

“Never killed anybody, though.”

— Woolie

“Never. Never once.”

— Little V

“I am getting a very, very pure Crime Ryu aura from this man, and I am also getting him alongside Leon and Dante in the "What is sex?" club.”

— Woolie

“Swords unsheathed, 'cause shots don't get fired.”

— Woolie

“You wanna mess with the Japanese branch of Latin Kings?”

— Woolie

“Hey, press the X X X and the Y Y Y.”

— Little V

“Oh yeah, we're gonna start collecting CP, I forgot about that.”

— Little V

“I like cheese pizza.”

— Woolie

“Big soupin'! All night soupin'!”

— Woolie

“Fuckin' Johnny Sack over here, the New York boys.”

— Woolie

“You're a skeezy old fuck, but you're teaching me cool shit, dude.”

— Woolie

“Woolie, it's the fuckin' 80's. Spend that fuckin' money, let's go!”

— Little V

“Okay, the pavement's made of coke, and underneath it there's the Jenova floor...”

— Woolie

“Yep.”

— Little V

“But beneath that floor there's the dog racing track and the casino.”

— Woolie

“This is the world where the priviliged have pores and creases.”

— Woolie

“This just became a PVP zone!”

— Woolie

“Formal attire plus warlord glasses, gotta be a yakuza boss.”

— Woolie

“Crime rules!”

— Woolie

“Crime is the best!”

— Little V

“Shakedown, shakedown! Shakedown, shakedown!”

— Woolie

“Woolie, he didn't just take your money, he took your batteries.”

— Little V

“You cannot believe how tight that kigu was! Mad clench!”

— Woolie

“Woolie, I'm the white one.”

— Little V

“Let's be honest: if there is ever a Gang-Star in this fuckin' world, it's fuckin' Kiryu.”

— Little V

“He's on the streets right now! COVID Shakedown appears!”

— Woolie

“COVID with a fedora and a blazer.”

— Little V

“Okay, but if you beat it, though, how much fuckin' money do you get?”

— Woolie

“All of it. All the money it's zapped from the world economy.”

— Little V

“Oh, Jesus, that's worth it!”

— Woolie

“I think that would be worth it, if you could fight it. Jesus.”

— Little V

“Just get the pattern down! Just hard cut to your body dead in the fuckin' streets, like, arm twisted backwards upside-down, like, embarrassing death pose.”

— Woolie

“Guys, Mina-chan is sus.”

— Little V

“Be sure to subscribe to her Turbo-tier.”

— Woolie

“Leave Jiren to him!”

— Woolie

“Bath water over the waterfall falling on my head, then I can get the purest training!”

— Woolie

“The Kink Shame Royal Guard has arrived!”

— Woolie

“No more sun for Canada. Sun is illegal.”

— Little V

“Sell your diamond plates for CP.”

— Little V

“"Lesson learned" theme activated.”

— Little V

“Sell your goddamn bath water and make a fuckin' killing.”

— Little V

“Hello, fellow...”

— Woolie

“Hobos.”

— Little V

“Dregs of society! I too am... downtrodden.”

— Woolie

“Dude, it's the 80's. Even the homeless people are picky.”

— Little V

“Hey, there you go. There's some CP after talking to the homeless people.”

— Little V

“Before I even gave it to him. What if I said no? They gave me free CP... hold on a second.”

— Woolie

“The question is, "Is this the David Cage flavor of noble hobos?"”

— Woolie

“The "V" stands from the "Volcano", that was from my dad's last name. You can probably guess where the volcano part came from, if you know Sicilians.”

— Little V

“True shogi players play for CP, after all.”

— Little V

“The Essence of Hustle!”

— Woolie

“Man, I'm like "His three styles are gonna be Thug, Hustle and Flow!"”

— Woolie

“There's only two genders: men and menn't.”

— Little V

“I go to a hostess club, and she's like, "Man, when are they gonna make Bloodborne 2?"”

— Woolie

“Welcome to fuckin' Yakuza: The Experience.”

— Little V

“Is this the goddamn Exar Kun armor all over again? Jesus Christ!”

— Little V

“Listen, I'm no stranger to wearing, like, offensive clothes. I mean, I was a metalhead teenager, I had that fuckin' "Jesus is a cunt" T-shirt that everyone always had.”

— Little V

“Why is there one shared life bar for this whole room? That's very suspicious!”

— Woolie

“Shooreh pippi is even harder!”

— Woolie

“This should've been the place where you spend your CP!”

— Woolie

“At an extra $5.99 premium package, you can have the bat with the nails in it!”

— Little V

“There you go! We call it the "shooreh pippi"!”

— Woolie

“How many internment camps do you think were edited out of the Mulan movie while it aired?”

— Little V

“Sephiroth summons Meteor! Here we fuckin' go!”

— Little V

“I look forward to "Little V is Over" party later tonight or when the episode airs, we'll see.”

— Little V

“I bet if you give her enough toys and enough dolls, you'll get some CP out of this.”

— Little V

“These games predate me. I did not know OutRun existed until I played this game.”

— Little V

“So it's just like the money is on my body right now.”

— Woolie

“They're using the game to stare at the camera and be like, "Fuck you! Taxation is theft!"”

— Woolie

“It's almost like the government are yakuza.”

— Woolie

“By Japanese definition, we're both criminals.”

— Little V

“Yep. I got a couple of black ladies on my back, huuuuuuge criminal!”

— Woolie

“Pazaak: part 2.”

— Little V

“No story progress can be made until birb acquired.”

— Little V

“Ol' Captain Save-A-Ho Makimura!”

— Woolie

“If you low angle geyser on the lady, you low angle on the boys!”

— Woolie

“Y'know, equality for everyone, man.”

— Little V

“Absolutely! Get the bulge in there, let's see the veins!”

— Woolie

“Did your pants happen to say "Bring on all the fights!"?”

— Woolie

“Woolie, did you just Heat Move a child?”

— Little V

“Maybeeeeee... but that child had 35 million yen on him.”

— Woolie

“Let's go, Benjamin Button, you fuckin' weirdo!”

— Woolie

“You can't pilot the robot at 40.”

— Woolie

“"Say it! Say it!" "I'm an idiot roll".”

— Woolie

“I remember the time you were telling me about gutter oil.”

— Little V

“Aquatic shakedowns.”

— Woolie

“What is the price of a boner?”

— Woolie

“"I will mamoru you!", breakdances furiously.”

— Woolie

“Well, we're not sharing resources?”

— Woolie

“Well, there is one resource we're sharing.”

— Little V

“CP? ComPos?”

— Woolie

“Hell yeah, dude, so much CP, showing between our main heroes.”

— Little V

“They trade?!... Fuck that, fuck that shit.”

— Woolie

“Powerbomb into American History X!”

— Woolie

“Balls exposed on stream.”

— Little V

“Remember, folks: if you ever have, like, a broken rib or heasvily bruised walking out of the fight, just drink some energy drinks, that'll bring you right back to fold.”

— Little V

“All keisatsu are bastards.”

— Woolie

“Also Kiryu, you dummy, dancing is foreplay.”

— Woolie

“It's like, 'Sure, he's glowing with purple energy, but he's wearing glasses, so that's business energy'.”

— Woolie

“There's also CP tied to getting in taxis, so if you get into enough taxis, you can get some CP out of it.”

— Little V

“I'm in real estate, get fucked, children.”

— Little V

“We were lost in our world of fun, and this kid just made it real!”

— Woolie

“And you're 12 months from becoming a wizard, Harry.”

— Woolie

“Cherryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy Faitaaaaaaaaa!”

— Woolie

“Someone else said, "You can't hide behind the 80s", and I say, yes, you fuckin' can. Have you seen the modern era?”

— Little V

“Canada, Bakumatsu period.”

— Woolie

“The door has accepted my deal!”

— Woolie

“You've dropkicked CP out of this man.”

— Little V

“I can't stop reading that name, it's Take-a-shita.”

— Little V

“Bezos has entered the battle! Step down so that he can spend more time fighting.”

— Woolie

“You know, if you think about it, a stun gun is a knife.”

— Woolie

“We're sleeping under the desks tonight, boys!”

— Woolie

“Woolie, would you like me to Guide Your Hips™?”

— Little V

“My name is Ryu, I like long walks on the beach, water without ice... and fireballs! And jumping into Light-Fierce!”

— Woolie

“It's like the noble journey to helping the stranger that the hero goes on is just about getting the dude's boner going.”

— Woolie

“Masochistic Man has joined your team as a findom.”

— Woolie

Trivia

• The music used for the intro is "Baka Mitai" from the Yakuza 0 OST. The first episode featured a version sung by Woolie and Little V.
• Episode 16 was instantly demonetized due to Little V describing an extremely edgy shirt he used to wear that said "Jesus is a cunt", so it had to be censored and re-uploaded.

Gallery

Woolie and V lose it when Kiryu uses kids in a S&M practice session in part thirty-six